Through the Open Window
by Ramblepedia
Summary: The noises of New York were harder for Blaine to deal with than he realized. What happened at McKinley still bothered him. Luckily he has a wonderful man in his life to soothe over his fears. (Set several months after Shooting Star when Blaine has just moved to New York.)


Originally posted on Archive of Our Own (AO3) under the same title.

This is a semi-reaction fic to Shooting Star since New York isn't exactly a quiet city. Takes place shortly after Blaine moved to New York (I have it so Sam hadn't arrived yet as this was a Klaine-relationship study piece and as this was the third Glee fic I wrote I wasn't quite ready to work with other characters yet when I wrote it).

* * *

Blaine was amazed with how well Kurt slept through absolutely everything. He was like a rock. Perhaps it was because he'd been here for such a long time already. The city that truly never slept. Blaine had been here a week and had never heard a moment of silence. He watched his fiancé's chest rise and fall in small, almost delicate motions as a siren blasted against the brick walls outside. It wasn't down their street but it was close enough. It was the third to pass by in fifteen minutes. The first had woken Blaine well before it had passed.

It really didn't help that some of the windows were open.

The arrangement made sense. Apartments in New York were expensive and two waitstaff jobs plus what Blaine's parents gave him each month did get them by, but it went a lot further when the bills were lower. Since the weather was good they had all agreed to turn off the air conditioner and toss open the windows. They could save as much as forty bucks doing that. Which Blaine was liable to turn right back around and spend on caffeinated beverages to keep himself awake during the day. Surely he'd get used to all this.

He easily remembered how Kurt had slept back in Lima. That morning almost two years ago. The first time. He'd tried to get up and make Kurt breakfast. His body had barely moved and Kurt had been up and teeming with energy. It barely took a breath. Now he felt like Kurt could sleep through a hurricane. He probably had.

Blaine tilted his head in and pressed a gentle kiss to the man's cheek. Kurt's head rolled slightly towards him. Some days Blaine couldn't understand how lucky he was. He was never ever going to do anything that might risk this again. He felt like such an idiot for what had happened. But they had moved past that. He was working really hard on forgiving himself. Kurt clearly already had. Blaine left another kiss on that beautiful cheek before re-situating and trying once again to get himself to sleep. His ear pressed up against Kurt's shoulder. A body was much better at blocking sound than a pillow.

Then it happened. That sound. There was no mistaking that sound.

The crack sounded like it was just outside the window. Blaine could feel it in his chest. He shot up from the bed, dragging half the blankets with him. Now Kurt was stirring. There was no way he couldn't. Blaine's rapid movements had shoved their bed an easy three inches to the right.

"Blaine? Hey, what's up?" Their hands found each other and locked together. Another gunshot. This time Kurt sat up too. "Wonder what's going on this time." Kurt was so casual about it. Blaine gulped. His heart was racing.

Yeah, Kurt knew what had happened at the school last year. They'd talked about it on the phone for days. But as time had gone on and the truth had come out Blaine had just stopped. Everyone else seemed to be moving on just fine. It wasn't a big deal after all. So Blaine didn't talk about it. He busied himself with things so he wouldn't have to think about it. That didn't change the terror that was knotted deep inside his stomach.

Two bare arms wrapped around his torso, one locked securely around his waist and the other laid to rest softly on his chest. There was a kiss against his cheek. Kurt had noticed. "Talk to me Blaine." One deep breath. One long, deep breath. Blaine swore to himself he'd start talking when he was done taking that breath. So he made it last as long as humanly possible. "Please."

"I was scared," tumbled out of his mouth. "Terrified." Kurt shifted his legs around Blaine and tried to pull him back into their cushioned bed. Blaine was too tense. All of the muscles in his body resisted. Kurt stopped pulling and just focused on snuggling. "I know. I know it wasn't a big deal but I didn't know that when it happened."

"You're talking about last year."

"Yeah." He lapsed into silence again.

"Keep talking. Get it all out." Blaine's eyes sought out Kurt's. They were so bright. There wasn't a hint of sleep in them. Kurt had always been like that. He could get up and be wide awake at a moment's notice. "I'm listening. I'm here." There was a pain in those beautiful eyes. Blaine almost didn't want to talk for fear of causing more hurt. Though the pain was only there because he was hurting. Getting it out was the only way to make the pain in both of them go away.

"I thought we were going to die. I thought I was going to die. I was so sure I'd never see you again. Never be able to make things up to you. Never tell you I love you again. Never...never have the chance to hear you tell me-"

"I love you."

"I love you so much Kurt. I love you... love you." Their lips met, pressed tight against each other as though it might be the last time they ever kissed. He didn't want to break apart but suddenly Kurt was climbing out of bed. Past their curtains. Peeking into Rachel's room.

"She has earplugs in. Do you want to get something to drink? Tea? Warm milk?"

"Sounds great." Blaine wanted to curl up with the man and never let go. But he followed his fiancé to the kitchen. This would probably be the last night for at least a week or two they could get up and talk like this anyway. Sam was going to be arriving tomorrow and everyone had agreed he could crash on their couch for a little while. Blaine didn't know his sleeping habits and while he suspected Sam could be a heavy sleeper (hadn't he lived in a hotel with small children for a time?) there was no way to be sure.

"So was that tea and warm milk or it doesn't matter or?"

"Whatever you want, I want it too." He leaned beside the stove as Kurt gathered them a pot of water for boiling.

"As cute as that is, are you sure you have no preference?"

"Positive." Another kiss. As Kurt started to pull away again Blaine grabbed onto his arms. The older man leaned back in and let his head rest on Blaine's shoulder.

"I'll talk to Rachel about keeping the windows shut from now on, ok?"

"I'm sorry."

"No, it's ok. We can afford it. I just wanted to have some extra spending money for shoes anyway. That is not worth your sanity." More sirens started to head their way so Kurt placed another soft kiss on Blaine's jaw before going to close up the windows and flick on their AC.

"I love you."

"I love you too." Kurt was quick to return to Blaine's side. They tangled up their arms and their fingers once again. "I guess I've just gotten used to the city. Is that sad? All that stuff can be going on and it doesn't bother me at all?"

"That's good. I hope that happens to me actually. That would be amazing, to sleep through all this. I've never been to a place this busy before though."

"Be glad we're higher up than the street lamps. Rachel said there was one right outside her dorm window and between that and her roommate there was no sleeping ever."

"Is that the roommate had sex in front of her?"

"Yes. Regularly." Blaine couldn't tell if that word was carrying a hint in it. He hadn't been able to go through with anything in bed when Rachel was in the loft. Mostly because of those stories. Since they were basically in the same situation with curtains in place of walls.

Whenever they started to get in too deep and Blaine got Kurt worked up enough to let out a nice, solid 'Oh Blaine!' he would always, without fail, remember that Rachel was just a few steps away. Which was easily the biggest turn off besides having a parent walk in on them. Which would inevitably lead him to freaking out and leaving Kurt very much unsatisfied.

Kurt was patient but it was clear he was getting antsy. It was amazing how he wasn't bashful though, with how much he'd freaked out every time someone found out he wasn't a virgin anymore back in high school. Then again Rachel had had plenty of sex while Kurt was trying to sleep before so maybe that barrier was already shattered for them. Though the stories did bother Blaine. He swore he would never fail to put pants on no matter how comfortable Rachel was with male anatomy. That just wasn't ok.

He hadn't realized he'd lapsed into silence. At least he hadn't been thinking about the incident. That was a first. To have it enter his mind and yet leave so quickly. Normally it haunted him for hours.

"Blaine? Are you listening to me?"

"I'm sorry I was...what were you saying?"

"What kind of tea?" Blaine thought a moment before motioning to the one already out on the counter. They didn't even bother putting it away after dinner because the two had agreed it was the best they'd had yet and had planned to have more in the morning. "What were you thinking about?"

"Rachel's roommate. And being Rachel's roommate. And getting used to being with you while being roommates with Rachel. And...last year."

"That's. An interesting progression."

"I realized I wasn't thinking about it so I started thinking about it again."

"Blaine, what happened? I mean, we know what happened, the official details. But to you. Not the actual stuff, since we know you guys just stayed in the choir room until you were given the all clear. But...what happened to you?" Kurt was about as good at articulating it as Blaine was. What had happened to him? He really felt that finding out the truth of the event should have set his mind at ease. But it hadn't. Even knowing they had never been in danger Blaine was still terrified of the possibility of someone bursting through the doors, waving a gun around, and putting a bullet in his head. Or Kurt's. Or anyone's, but mostly his and Kurt's. He wanted to live a full life with this man.

"I don't know. I have never been so scared Kurt. Not even...not even at the dance, way back, you know? I mean, I was terrified then but this was different. You can't fight back against a bullet. Once one hits you it's over. You won't be around another day. And I know. I know it wasn't...I know Becky wasn't going to actually hurt anyone. We know that now but that doesn't...that doesn't make it easier." He felt Kurt turn and turn their two bodies into one giant knot. "It's gotten a lot easier, but for a while whenever I tried to sleep all I could think about was what would happen, what could have happened, what if. And sometimes I'd think about the city. New York is great in so many ways but more people means more places where attackers could hide. With their guns. I swear if not for that counselor they provided for us I would have been calling you every morning and night to make sure you were still alive. I know it's crazy, and most times I'm ok. I haven't even thought about it since moving in. I was worried coming here might take me right back but it hasn't."

He felt Kurt shift a bit. Open his mouth against his shoulder to speak then close it again without a word. Clearly there was something on Kurt's mind. Blaine was almost finished though. "I'm doing great, I promise. I just...that gunshot just now. It scared me but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I am a bit worried for what might have just happened, but its not really that important to us. I'm pretty ok. Just for a moment though I felt like I was back in that room. Not knowing if I'd ever see you again. But it's passed now."

The water started boiling. "Blaine," Kurt said, not tending to the water just yet. The tea was too far away for them to just reach from where they were standing. "If, in the middle of the night, if this or anything like this happens, you can wake me up immediately ok?" He shifted again against Blaine. "I really wish you'd told me sooner, called me, talked to me about this. We could have been ready. I never would have suggested we leave the windows open if I'd known. I know its a city and we're going to hear things like that." Blaine watched as he chewed on his lip for a second. "I wish I had been there to help you through it-"

"It's ok. I'm ok," he cut Kurt off, leaning in for a kiss.

"I know, but I could have just been there for you. At least I am here now."

"Yes you are." They held each other tightly.

"One of the most amazing things about our relationship is that we can help each other. I want to do everything I can to make you happy, and keep you happy. And you've done so much for me."

"Because I want to do everything I can to make you happy." This relationship really was perfect. As perfect as one could be. They were going to argue, sure, but they also found fulfillment within themselves from doing everything they could for each other. Kurt leaned in for another kiss. A deep, passionate, almost dirty kiss. No, scratch that. It was definitely a dirty kiss.

Blaine snaked his arm around to turn off the stove. They could forget the tea. They were together and Rachel wasn't going to be waking up. Kurt pulled on Blaine's body as he backed up. Yeah Blaine was going to try to keep things quiet but he made no promises.


End file.
